This week I wrote someone a fan letter. I won’t reveal who it is right now, because I haven’t heard back, and who knows—maybe this person doesn’t want mail from strangers. We’ve never met, far as I know. But I’ve enjoyed their work for years.
I’ve sent a bunch of fan letters over the years, and have received many lovely ones. (I guess I should say this: This post is not fishing for y’all to send me fan letters. I’m the one who should be sending them to you for all the love and support.) Over the years I’ve come up with a few thoughts about fan letters:
It’s better if you don’t ask for anything. I mean, if you’re 8 years old and you want an autograph from Shohei Ohtani, sure. If you’re looking for advice on your career or something, maybe. But the best letters are simple gratitude.
It helps if you mention something specific instead of just gushing. Sometimes it’s hard to avoid. I would’ve probably been like Chris Farley around Paul McCartney, too:
When I write a fan letter, I try to mention one main thing and hold it to that as best I can. It keeps the letter shorter and (I hope) more memorable.
The best fan letters are for people who don’t get fan letters. Write fan letters to your parents! Your kids’ teachers! The neighbor who trimmed your bushes when you were sick! The server who brought you more sweet tea without being asked!
Years ago I stayed at a Hampton Inn somewhere in middle Tennessee, and when I got to my room the housekeeper had made a towel sculpture on the bedspread:
Apparently she did this in all the rooms she worked in. Another day I came back to find a turtle. I wrote her a note when I checked out and gave it to the manager to pass along. A few days later, the housekeeper emailed me to say how much it meant to her. There are always people in your life who do more than they have to, who show a little extra kindness to the people they encounter. If you encounter one of them, let them know.
Here’s the other thing about it: It will probably make you feel as good as it makes them feel. Telling someone else how much you appreciate them makes your whole life better: You’ll walk around with a bounce in your step, people will smile at you more, who knows, you might find a $20 on the street. That’s not the reason to send a fan letter; it’s just one of the benefits. The real benefit is telling some other hard-working person that you noticed, and that they’re not alone.
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10 things I wanted to share this week:
The most stunning story I read this week—maybe this year—was Jessica Contrera’s piece about a mother and two daughters who all have deeper relationships with their chatbots than they do with one another. It’s the best story I’ve read yet about how—and why—people become attached to A.I. at the same time they become detached from their family and friends. It’s a horror movie of sorts, and an absolute heartbreaker. (New Yorker)
A son of Indian immigrants thought he had won the National Civics Contest … until a couple of answers he thought were right were marked wrong. It left his family wondering whether, in our current America, he was destined to lose. (NOTUS)
A beautiful answer by Carolyn Hax to a difficult question: “How do you make yourself happy — when the world demands you to be sad?” (WashPost)
Emily Hackney prepared for everything before setting off to walk the Appalachian Trail. Well, almost everything: She didn’t expect to fall for two men. (NYT)
My friend Joe Posnanski unveiled the cover for his upcoming book FIFTY SEASONS (available for preorder now!) and it’s a beaut:
If you’d like to know more about the cover photo, here you go.
A former monk reframes how you should use your smartphone: “Your phone's home screen, your followed accounts, your notification settings—these are the walls of a room you live in for several hours every day. Most people have never once deliberately designed that room. They've just let it fill up.” (Time)
We thoroughly enjoyed WIDOW’S BAY—it made us laugh out loud even as it scared the hell out of us. It’s not a Stephen King creation, but it’s definitely King-inspired: the New England setting, the haunted old mansions, the looming dread. There’s also an episode that’s a direct tribute to the original HALLOWEEN. And did I mention it’s funny as hell? It works because of the deft writing and the excellent cast, especially Kate O’Flynn as a mousy mayor’s assistant who turns out to be a LOT tougher than she looks. (Apple TV)
We also blazed through RIDE OR DIE, a buddy action-comedy starring Octavia Spencer and Hannah Waddingham as two longtime friends—but one of them has a secret. I could watch these two in pretty much anything. (Prime Video)
Have you seen those little cards in bookstores that give staff recommendations? This one is gonna be hard to beat.
One of my favorite bands, Alabama Shakes, is releasing a new album in August after an 11-year hiatus. It’s called I MUST BE DREAMING, which is how I felt when I heard it was coming out. Here’s a pre-release track, “I Feel Hope Coming”:
Have a great weekend, everybody.
—TT
My books DOGLAND and THE ELEPHANT IN THE ROOM are available in all formats pretty much everywhere books are sold.
RIP Glen Hansard. Your rave reviews of "Once" helped me discover that great movie. Thank you!
Really appreciate The Shed, Tommy, every time.