THE ELEPHANT IN THE ROOM, five years in

A book anniversary, plus my weekly shareables: Making choices, listening to a cappella, and picking up the Bird Phone

This week marked a nice little anniversary in my writing life … my first book, THE ELEPHANT IN THE ROOM, turned five years old.

ELEPHANT changed my life in more ways than I can say—probably in more ways than I even understand. Most simply, I found out I was capable of writing a book. I discovered I could talk about my lifelong weight problem in an honest and straightforward way. It opened doors to better conversations with the people I care about. And I was able to create something that rippled out into the world in a way that people found meaningful.

Those ripples continue. Just this week I heard from a group that is reading ELEPHANT for their book club and wants me to talk to them about it. Two other people have emailed to let me know they found the book and it helped them through their struggles. This is the thing about books. Newspaper stories and radio pieces are designed to be perishable—they’re archived online somewhere, maybe, but you have to go look for them. A book lives on the shelf at a bookstore or library. You can just stumble across it. And that random encounter can change your life.

I’m not going to spend too much time today going through my personal journey—I do want to revisit it here at some point, maybe once some other deadlines have passed. If you read ELEPHANT, you know I had some success at losing weight, but it was an up-and-down process. That has continued to be the case. Every month I’m a little better than I was, but still not where I want to be. That’s a natural byproduct of the way I approached this—to lose weight slowly and sustainably.

(Since the book came out, new drugs like Ozempic and Mounjaro have shown some real promise to help people lose weight in a responsible way. A couple of my friends have had great success. The problem is that the drugs are expensive and hard to get. My insurance company declined to cover my prescription because I’m a little too healthy—overweight, but not diabetic or even pre-diabetic. Which I guess is a good problem to have.)

Still, I’m often my own worst enemy—I overindulge, under-exercise, get down on myself even when I’m doing OK. But I come at it from a better place than I did before writing the book. My story is out there. Now I just have to craft the next phase of it with love and care.

The people I’ve heard from over these last five years—and there have been thousands of them—are still struggling, too. And not always with their weight. Sometimes it’s drugs, sometimes it’s alcohol, sometimes it’s anxiety or depression. They’ve said that my story helped them understand their lives. That’s about all I could ask for in terms of how the book has landed in the world.

I’m also grateful that it has sold well enough that I got to write another book. You might possibly have heard once or twice that you can PREORDER DOGLAND NOW—go through Park Road Books and I’ll inscribe it however you like; preorder from other outlets if you’d rather. We’re only about three months out from publication day. Every preorder counts!

And for those of you who have bought (or plan to buy) BOTH books … well, you’re twice as close to heaven.

It’s a great privilege to get to make books for a living—just as it’s a privilege to make podcasts and newsletters and all the rest. I remember walking through the library at my elementary school when I was a little kid and being stunned that there were so many books, and not quite believing I could just pull one off the shelf and read it if I wanted to. It hadn’t dawned on me at the time that people made those books, and they made a living at it, the same way my mom and dad made a living at the seafood plant. As soon as I figured out writing could be a job, it was the only job I ever wanted. I’m still amazed that it happened. I’m amazed that I’ve had one book out for five years and another one is on the way. I’ll never stop being amazed.

10 things I wanted to share this week:

1. My guest on this week’s SouthBound is the hilarious Landon Bryant, whose “Landon Talks” videos on the quirks of the South get views in the millions across social media. We talked about everything from changing views of Southern masculinity to how many syllables are in the word “towel.” (There is only one right answer.)

2. My weekly for WFAE was on Ronnie Long, who spent 44 years in prison before his conviction was overturned. If there is something beyond the word “travesty,” this was it.

3. My favorite story this week: A musician adapted an old pay phone to play bird calls. Now people line up around the block to hear it. (Washington Post)

4. Excellent advice on writing and life: It’s about making choices. (The Lit Lab)

5. DOG NEWS: From now until DOGLAND comes out (April 23!), I’m devoting this slot to dog stories. This week: We recently reported in this space the death of Bobi, the world’s oldest dog. Now … maybe he wasn't that old. (NYT).

6. Austin Kleon on idea gardens—ideas as things that have to be cultivated, weeded, picked at the right time.

7. How an obscure cut by a barely-known Atlanta duo became a standard among a cappella singing groups. (Featuring a Meg Ryan cameo!) (NYT)

8. Finished my first book of the year: THE CROW TRAP, the first book in Ann Cleeves’ Vera Stanhope mystery series. It was a little long—all the time they spent wandering around the countryside gave me Thomas Hardy flashbacks—but the reveal was a genuine surprise.

9. I’m trying to be systematic about my search for new music this year, and one great source is the DON’T ROCK THE INBOX newsletter—Marissa Moss and Natalie Weiner have regular roundups of their favorite new country (as opposed to “new country”) tracks.

10. DON’T ROCK THE INBOX is where I discovered the Secret Sisters’ new song “Same Water,” which doesn’t have the regular dose of their gorgeous harmonies, but is a stunner just the same.
    

    Have a great week, everybody.