That has to be you now

On being a helper

I didn’t know Grant Wahl, but many of my journalist friends did, and I was genuinely astonished at the stories so many of them told after his tragic death at the World Cup in Qatar. (Here’s Chris Jones and Joe Posnanski, for starters.)

They told stories about his courage in covering the tough issues in soccer, and especially in this World Cup. They talked about his curiosity as a reporter and skill as a writer. But mostly they talked about his generous spirit. Writer after writer told how Grant encouraged them, helped them work on ideas, took the time to explain his sport and his world to those just walking in.

Which leads me to this tweet from my friend Spencer Hall, who’s known for covering college football but also interacted with Grant:

BUM CHILLUPS AKA SPENCER HALL @edsbs

One more thing, I see a lot of people talking about how his kindness, his principles, and his willingness to help others are irreplaceable, which they are but That has to be you now You have to be that person for someone

So many people gave me a boost when I was just starting out in journalism—editors who regularly saved me from myself, other writers who gave me a continuing education. As a columnist, magazine writer and book author, I’m often parachuting into territory that others have been working for years. I’ll never know as much as they do. So many of those folks have been more than generous with their knowledge and time. I still lean on a whole squadron of friends and co-workers to explain some new corner of the world, or just to make me feel better when I’m struggling.

And so along the way, I’ve pledged to do the same for others who wander into areas I might know a little something about.

In a competitive world, you might feel wary about sharing what you know. But in my experience it’s been a huge blessing. It just feels good to help other people. The karma rewards are real—the more you give, the more you’ll get when you need it. And you’ll end up with a wider circle of friends and colleagues you can count on, because they can count on you.

Mister Rogers famously said to look for the helpers. It’s even better, I think, if you can BE a helper. No matter what you do, or how long you’ve done it, there’s probably somebody who knows less than you—somebody who might aspire to be in the place you’re in, or doesn’t yet understand what you understand. It takes guts to ask for help. Be gentle and generous.

If you help those people, they’ll always remember. Just like so many remember Grant Wahl.