Sometimes you get what you need

A shot of live music, plus Links of the Week: searching for Clarence Thomas, on the road with Willie Nelson, and the odd journey of a missing pickle

To be honest, I wanted to stay home. My friend Jeff had invited me to the show—he was playing in a one-off band that the folks in Charlotte’s Creative Mornings group had put together. They formed the band, did one rehearsal, and were performing one night only. Just three songs. In and out.

The bar was crowded and I couldn’t find a good place to sit. It was a big band, and there were some logistics to work out, so it took time to set things up. There was an opening act I didn’t expect, and they played longer than I thought they would. I went outside on the patio and sat by myself for a while, trying to decide if I should leave.

None of those problems were actual problems. The real problem was that I had pretty much broken up with live music. It used to be one of the great joys of my life. But when COVID hit, and then my elderly mother-in-law moved in, a sweaty club or even a concert hall seemed like one of the most risky places to be. It was one of the sacrifices we needed to make to keep our family healthy and alive. Even as we eased back into a mostly maskless world, concerts felt like too much of a gamble. Every time somebody I wanted to see came through town, I tried to ignore it. It tore a little hole inside me. I tried to ignore that, too.

This little three-song show was a dip back in the pool. But when I got there it still felt weird. The fearful part of me kept looking for a reason to bolt. Just when I was getting up to go, I heard the pop of a snare drum. Sound check. The show was about to start.

Song one was Tears For Fears’ “Head Over Heels.” It sounded pretty good from out on the patio. I slipped into the back of the bar.

Song two was Amy Winehouse’s “Rehab.” It sounded even better inside—sort of like Phil Spector’s old Wall of Sound. There were three or four singers, two or three drummers, a violinist, a tuba in the back, plus the normal keyboards and guitars and such. It was ragged, but “Rehab” should be ragged. People in the crowd were on their feet, doing the handclaps in the chorus.

Song three was “You Can’t Always Get What You Want.”

This was not fair.

There are eight or ten Stones songs that are probably better, and certainly more important to the story of rock ‘n’ roll, but “You Can’t Always Get What You Want” is the one that chokes me up every time I hear it. I don’t know if it’s that lonely French horn, or the children’s choir, or maybe just the lyrical hook, such a damn cliché but so true all the same:

You can’t always get what you want

But if you try sometime

You just might find

You get what you need

I was sitting in the back, there was no one looking at me, but I still turned my head to the wall so nobody could see me cry.

I’d forgotten just how much I missed all of it—the vibe of the crowd, the looks on the musicians’ faces, the thrum of the bass in my chest. It was just three songs. It was exactly enough.

10 things I wanted to share this week:

1. My guest on this week’s SouthBound is the great Beth Macy, whose new book RAISING LAZARUS is a tribute to the helpers on the front line of the opioid crisis. It’s also a sequel of sorts to her best-seller DOPESICK, which was made into a limited series on Hulu (14 Emmy nominations!).

2. My weekly for WFAE was on how we treat prisoners, and what that says about us.

3. The brilliant Mitchell S. Jackson goes looking for Clarence Thomas in the tiny Georgia town where Thomas grew up.

4. Willie Nelson is almost 90, and he still longs to make music with his friends and get on the road again.

5. DOG NEWS: While I work on my book, I’m devoting this slot to dog stories. This week: A tribute to Fooey, the news bureau guard dog of Papua New Guinea.

6. My friend Tonya Simpson has a hilarious story on the strange journey of Dillon T. Pickle.

7. An author reunites with the teacher who changed his life.

8. Among the many things I learned from this Hollywood Reporter piece on Steve Martin: He married the woman who fact-checked one of his stories for the New Yorker.

9. Enjoyed this Pat Forde profile of Stetson Bennett, the former walk-on who led my Georgia Bulldogs to the national title last year.

10. Look, if you think I’m going to write about “You Can’t Always Get What You Want” without playing it here at the end, you’re crazy.
    

See y’all next week, everybody.

P.S. A quick reminder: I’m going to do an AMA (Ask Me Anything) post for paid subscribers only on Sept. 15. Ask anything you like! Any of y’all—free and paid subscribers—are welcome to ask questions. But only paid subscribers will be able to see the AMA post. I’ll be taking questions through Sept. 14. Just leave your question in the comments or reply to this post.

And while you’re at it, there’s never a bad time to upgrade to a paid subscription: